Awakening

It was March of 2014.

A plane went missing over Malaysia. Y’all remember?

It just happened I worked at sonic with a J. Smith, conspiracy theorist; my manager. This man would set me on my awakening journey. He told all of us about the conspiracies around the news stories and why the plane went missing. The plane had some scientists on it that had invented a total hydro ran car, and it couldn’t be revealed. The powers that be wouldn’t allow it because it would mess up the oil industry, what ‘Merica is founded in.

He told me about 9/11 and some other things going on that I was blind to. I listened from a place deep down inside me, eager to know truth.

He sparked something in me, and it set off months and months worth of obsessive research into the hidden world of our government, national and global. I learned about the millions of caskets in fields all over, I learned how nano technology has its hand in control. The things I began learning were terrible, and The rabbit hole only got deeper.

I learned of so many things that shook my soul that eventually I hated America. I wanted to leave so bad. This country was ruined in my eyes and I saw no hope. I had to quit. I learned quite enough truth in all that, and saw it’s effects on humanity in our country that anxiety kicked in. Fear.

This bomb in my reality had a hand in me leaving my boyfriend at the time and moving in with my sister. I moved to Louisiana, where my sister introduced me to Islam. She gifted me some books that I began to read. My spirituality became the forefront of my life. Who was I? Why did I hurt so bad? Where did I come from? Why had life been so terrible and why did it seem I was cursed? I cried. For months. This was the first time my body had been free from chemicals like thc, alcohol, and cigarettes. I wasn’t eating pork, and I was reading the Quran with respect to the religion. Covered and doing prayers. This time would awaken my soul.

I spent a summer having the most realistic dreams I’ve ever had, some past life and some that came true the next day. I had a dream about who and what I was, Source. This time brought many people into my life, including some that would watch me, and guide me as I awakened fully. I learned I was empathic and feeling the pain of the planet, and humanity and that’s why I cried like I did in those days. I learned that I came from elsewhere and was not quite human.

Life picked up quickly after that summer and my own traumas began manifesting into deep depression, ptsd, and anxiety. I was buried in chemical meds and told I was crazy. The years that followed would lead me to mental wards, and psychologically conformed doctors appointments every other week.

Misery.

My magick called me. My higher self, my guides, my cards, my candles. It was 2019. March if I’m not mistaken when I learned about manifesting, enhanced my spiritual relationships, and found my self love. My tarot cards and how I read changed my soul. I became a witch.

Not long after that, my mom would pass away, and I’d venture to Oklahoma. This was where my second awakening happened, on heroic doses of mushrooms and traumatic violence.

Dark night of the soul, to the darkest and most evil degree. It woke up all my psychic powers though. It showed me what I was, that 6 months brought out a Goddess.

My awakening isn’t over. I’ve got one more step. It’s the chemical addiction in our things like foods and meds. Marijuana is a plant I’m dependent on, and that’s holding my evolution back. I’m excited to see the growth and power I have hidden within me.

This awakening stuff doesn’t happen instantly. It happens over time. Once you hit that first step, the conspiracy level, the one that shows you what your reality actually is, you’ll never go back unless you choose to. I’ve learned so much, I’ve gone from seeking answers from outside sources, doing my own research, and depending on others to learn the basics to feeling like I really don’t need answers from anyone but me. I am All. I’ve learned that all of the universe is within me, including a a goddess with the powers to create all she desires.

I know now, that it’s not just America. It’s the whole world, all of time, and everything we knew to be true when we were growing up. And my hatred has turned to compassion and love, I want to help others see the truth I see. The powers hidden within each of us are magnificent! The powers we have to manifest our realities are outstanding. This hasn’t been easy but it takes Truth to know yourself. You’re a god, that has been lied to, manipulated, and chemically drugged to feel like you’re a lot less than that. I say no more! I won’t allow myself to be manipulated and abused by the world, the powers that be, the 1%. I’m fighting back; By becoming the most healthy version of me in this life. ❤️

Published by primrosephoenix

I Am All

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